DEAR DEIDRE: WHENEVER my boyfriend’s phone vibrates, I get upset. I fear he is talking to other guys and will run off with one of them.
I am a gay guy of 28, while he is 30. He assures me every day it is me he loves and always will. He even proposed to me last year.
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I don’t know why I have these horrid feelings. If somebody adds him on social media, my heart sinks.
We have been together for three years but I can hardly sleep or eat with worry about him leaving.
I know it’s OK for him to talk to other guys he knows but I feel as if someone is going to come and sweep him off his feet and I will end up heartbroken.
DEIDRE SAYS: Did you have a childhood in which love always felt provisional? Or has your boyfriend actually given you reason to feel uneasy?
Yes, it is OK for him to have male friends. But their chats should be friendly – the sort he would be perfectly happy to share with you.
My e-leaflet on Dealing With Jealousy will help you find healthier ways to cope. Asking for a reassuring hug is usually a good start.
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